A new service offers warranties on miracles. If your prayer glitches, file a ticket. Response time: two to three business days. One woman requests a replacement for a rain of frogs; she ordered butterflies. A man complains that his burning bush will not stop smoldering. Customer support emails polite apologies and troubleshooting steps. Miracles become bureaucratic, but at least they come with tracking numbers. Somewhere, the universe learns to print RMA labels.
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